honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
