I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize