FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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