yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
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his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
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I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
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