My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
