i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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