He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
