lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
