so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
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you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
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My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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