It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.