come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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