At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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