let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
