Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize