her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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