made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
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