Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
