Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
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He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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