Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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