Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
she told me i tasted like america
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
