It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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