The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
