I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
