Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize