it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
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Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I don't deserve a penis
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
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I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies