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• (561): View more from Florida

  So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.

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• (716): View more from New York

  I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.

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• 

  Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (586): View more from Michigan

  he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!

  (207): View more from Maine

  I just puked in my drinking hat.

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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table

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• (408): View more from California

  Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing

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• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (612): View more from Minnesota

  I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.

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• (682): View more from Texas

  You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...

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• (281): View more from Texas

  I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  Is this like a preordered booty call?

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• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.

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