Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
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