just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
