Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Randomize
