so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
