You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
