I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
