I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
