I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
