he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
