Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(803): View more from South Carolina

Operation extremely regretful is in full effect

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(803): Operation extremely regretful is in full effect http://tfl.nu/gnro

Replies (3) Good night (1101) Bad night (538)
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(210): View more from Texas

Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?

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(210): Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat? http://tfl.nu/57e1

Replies (25) Good night (2939) Bad night (820)
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(804): View more from Virginia

it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.

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(804): it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself. http://tfl.nu/cxw0

Replies (12) Good night (508) Bad night (3325)
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(518): View more from New York

True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.

(1-518): View more from New York

True? Did she teach you things?

(518): View more from New York

She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.

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(518): True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night. (1-518): True? Did she teach you things? (518): She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am. http://tfl.nu/r18t

Replies (13) Good night (2774) Bad night (681)
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(707): View more from California

OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.

(1-707): View more from California

Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.

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(707): OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy. (1-707): Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots. http://tfl.nu/h6l1

Replies (11) Good night (1537) Bad night (3155)
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(912): View more from Georgia

well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.

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(912): well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing. http://tfl.nu/4jog

Replies (9) Good night (3136) Bad night (767)
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(217): View more from Illinois

just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good

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(217): just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good http://tfl.nu/mlgi

Replies (6) Good night (4619) Bad night (884)
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(303): View more from Colorado

I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep

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(303): I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep http://tfl.nu/pnlq

Replies (21) Good night (1322) Bad night (4720)
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(702): View more from Nevada

Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision

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(702): Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision http://tfl.nu/1pgb

Replies (21) Good night (4632) Bad night (584)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?

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(+44): PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end? http://tfl.nu/1yv9

Replies (4) Good night (1619) Bad night (443)
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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH

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(781): I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH http://tfl.nu/y9eb

Replies (8) Good night (1268) Bad night (354)
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(605): View more from South Dakota

We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often

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(605): We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often http://tfl.nu/nvi7

Replies (2) Good night (917) Bad night (413)
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(831): View more from California

I won't be able to get a boner for a month

(916): View more from California

Challenge accepted.

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(831): I won't be able to get a boner for a month (916): Challenge accepted. http://tfl.nu/ivke

Replies (3) Good night (1216) Bad night (305)
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(408): View more from California

I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.

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(408): I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility. http://tfl.nu/5lhi

Replies (1) Good night (285) Bad night (396)
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(830): View more from Texas

You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.

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(830): You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations. http://tfl.nu/eber

Replies (3) Good night (565) Bad night (390)

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