Texts From Last Night

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  (206): View more from Washington

  This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.

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  (206): This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it. http://tfl.nu/dmrx
  Replies (13) Good night (1857) Bad night (532)
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  (646): View more from New York

  He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b

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  (646): He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b http://tfl.nu/u8b0
  Replies (29) Good night (2109) Bad night (1412)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  How wet are you?

  (1-908): View more from New Jersey

  Ever heard of a U-boat?

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  (908): How wet are you? (1-908): Ever heard of a U-boat? http://tfl.nu/c25g
  Replies (16) Good night (3853) Bad night (562)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.

  (360): View more from Washington

  You're getting good at this, you know that?

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  (206): Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number. (360): You're getting good at this, you know that? http://tfl.nu/w185
  Replies (17) Good night (6885) Bad night (627)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.

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  (908): a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester. http://tfl.nu/e11n
  Replies (52) Good night (4071) Bad night (603)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.

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  (406): As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network. http://tfl.nu/cww0
  Replies (19) Good night (5408) Bad night (934)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday

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  (573): Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday http://tfl.nu/e47n
  Replies (7) Good night (4470) Bad night (718)
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  (516): View more from New York

  In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea

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  (516): In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea http://tfl.nu/v7d1
  Replies (21) Good night (1438) Bad night (5184)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving

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  (740): you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving http://tfl.nu/qna9
  Replies (14) Good night (3352) Bad night (919)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think

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  (763): using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think http://tfl.nu/9ucc
  Replies (3) Good night (2607) Bad night (974)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.

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  (973): I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication. http://tfl.nu/0f45
  Replies (6) Good night (2182) Bad night (547)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring

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  (501): So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring http://tfl.nu/8ezz
  Replies (4) Good night (759) Bad night (340)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.

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  (720): New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air. http://tfl.nu/zwsc
  Replies (1) Good night (724) Bad night (232)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.

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  (636): I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic. http://tfl.nu/a1yu
  Replies (1) Good night (829) Bad night (233)
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  (518): View more from New York

  It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected

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  (518): It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected http://tfl.nu/wv1f
  Replies (0) Good night (426) Bad night (265)

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