well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
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