Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Damn victory sex feels great
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