we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
