You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
smell my finger.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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