I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize