i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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