Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Randomize
