Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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