Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
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