You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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