I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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