I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
Is it because I queefed?
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
