i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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