hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
he fucked my hip out of place.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
