at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
