How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
