I'll bet she douches with gravy.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
